Only met Davis Ayer the one time, when I interviewed him for TPJ. Real decent interaction, I can say that about the man.

Beyond that, I only have the body of work. The guy could fucking shoot, sheesh. The way he could both treat the film in ways both fantastic and aesthetically pleasing, while paying equal attention to his subjects...epic talent.

Found out last week he'd passed away...I'd lost track of him, past few years, that's the nature of things, right? We'd followed each other here, on Tumblr, on Instagram, but after awhile interests shift, life happens. Hadn't corresponded with him in years.

I know a few photographers talk about legacy, what they want to leave behind...and he certainly left behind an incredible body of photography. But he's still gone, can't enjoy how people think of him, now. Can't appreciate the outpouring of grief from family and friends. Can't appreciate this post.

I used to see a good deal of death at work, inured me to it in some ways...but I haven't driven in an ambulance in a good many years. These days, death hits different. From a celebrity committing suicide, to a guy from a show I watched decades ago passing away at 92, to Davis at 38.

It stays with me, hangs around in the air. Gets me thinking about...well, all of it. How we're living our lives, what we mean to each other, have we said what we needed to say, are we doing what we need to do.

His pictures are great, but I'd rather he was still around.

Tags:   1.11.15 Davis Ayer portrait

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I'm sitting here listening to Jason's NEW ALBUM, trying to come up with a smooth way to sell it to y'all...but hell, the internet is beyond such tawdry machinations! We've evolved past The Sell when it comes to a lot of art. There's not a lot of risk, in the year of our lord 2022, at least when it comes to buying stuff. Maybe that's bad! I'm just a simple medic, these heady thoughts are above my pay grade.

You want to buy some of my old photo books, go to blurb, check 'em out. Jason's been. friend of mine (through Flickr!) for over a decade, but I still wanted to hear some songs before I laid down my hard-earned (not really) cash money. He's a great dude, nice as hell, a truly inspired photographer...but that don't mean he can carry a tune!

Fortunately, he's put it on All the music services, so...look, you want some cool pop music in your ears, get the album. Give it a listen HERE, see if you like it. I'm betting you'll like it. It's good!

Me, I spent the last year surfing, building shit out of Lego, trying new restaurants with my girlfriend. Jason? He got married AND made an album of excellent pop songs. This fucking guy.

Tags:   1.8.20 Jason Travis polaroid 680 portrait

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Ten years ago today, Kevin Mason (better known on Flickr as DarkDaze) came to town.

We'd been Flickr friends for a few year when, in 2010, he flew me out to England, had me teach some portrait workshops at his photo studio. Flew me out, put me up, fed me, plied me with drink, it was an transcendent experience.

Life-changing.

So we did it again in 2011! Again, probably the best fun I had that year.

And I had a lot of fun that year.

So when he decided to do a road trip through some of the US, I insisted he stop in LA, so that I could, in some small way, return the favor.

By taking his picture and buying him breakfast.

Okay, so it wasn't exactly an Equal favor, but I think he appreciated it all the same!

Haven't seen him since, he moved from England to Germany, built himself a seemingly-fun life out there. But we still talk, emails now and again, DMs now and again.

And I'll always remember him for the role he played in changing how I looked at photography. Self-taught shmuck like myself, it was invaluable, breaking down my own work, talking about photography with a Kevin, whose knowledge ran so much deeper than mine, who thought about it in the ways that I wanted to. We spent hours walking the streets of Brighton, talking photography. Man, nothing like it.

So Happy New Year's, everybody! May we all keep shooting and chatting and meeting great folks because of the internet and being alive!

Tags:   12.31.11 Kevin Mason polaroid 680 Los Angeles portrait

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In the gauzy past of the mid-2000s, there were models everybody wanted to shoot, here in Internet Photography Land. Women (always women) who had become popular on Flickr, Tumblr, who would occasionally travel around the country modeling for photographers...does that even still happen?

They'd put out travel notices, you'd see them on all your favorite internet photographers' pages, they were the lifeblood of a certain section of internet photography.

And Hattie Watson was probably at the top of the list. She was very good in front of the camera, heavily tattooed, folks loved shooting her.

Despite several attempts, through no fault of our own, I never got to actually have a shoot with her.

But I did get to meet her a few times...and really, that's a big part of the whole thing, for me, to actually meet and engage with people. Getting to know a person, that's the goal, photography is simply the medium through which I achieve that.

After meeting her, the desire to shoot her pretty much faded. She's on the Polaroid wall, what more do I need! It was almost as if she was Too popular, I didn't really see the challenge in it. Felt gauche, to be one more person asking for a photo shoot.

But she does still have a lens I let her borrow...

Tags:   12.12.15 Hattie Watson polaroid 680

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Met Rebecca online years and years back, during the early days on Flickr, chatting back and forth, her out in Nashville, me...where I always am, here in LA. Almost ALMOST met up back in...oh god, 2009?

But she flaked, oh how she flaked!

And I was left wondering, would we have gotten along, would we have had a good time?

The kind of thing that used to nag at me a lot, missed opportunities, roads not taken, that sort of thing. "Oh if only..."

If you're lucky (and I have been very lucky), actual life is enjoyable enough, the maybes and might've beens recede into a hazy past. Too much to do in the present.

But I am also a man with a continuing relationship to the past. Looking at old photos, old interactions online.

And sometime in 2016, Rebecca and I reconnected, a comment on some photo, an accepted friend request on Facebook.

Next thing you know we're taking pictures outside my favorite Mexican restaurant.

Little bit of patience, little bit of forgiveness, and you find yourself laughing it up with a new/old friend.

Tags:   6.15.16 Rebecca Gillespie portrait

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